Category Princeton

Articles related to life at Princeton, the Ivy League, and other college matters.

News, Princeton

Nevertheless, Woman to Bicker T.I.

In a move that has stunned observers, local woman Laura Blake ’17 has evidently decided, nevertheless, to bicker Tiger Inn. Blake, who identifies as a woman and was accepted to Princeton University, for God’s sake, carries a 3.6 GPA,…

Stephen Wood
February 2, 2015

Princeton

Princeton Freshman Disproves Gravity

The scientific community has been turned upside down after Princeton University freshman Natalia Chen found that the two-hundred-year-old established value for the acceleration of gravity on earth is incorrect.

Former Writers Who Wish To Remain Anonymous
January 16, 2015

Princeton

University Winter Recess Reminders

Don't forget to dispose of all trash, recycling, and evidence!

Former Writers Who Wish To Remain Anonymous
December 24, 2014

Princeton

How the Dinky Spent Its Week Off

“This,” said Sir Topham Hatt, “is Dinky. She’s here for the week from the Orange Bubble of Princeton to help out while her line is being mended. She runs a branch line, so I’m going to have her run your branch line for the week, Thomas. Now go shunt freight cars in the yard.”

Jeremy Cohen
December 4, 2014

How-To, Princeton

The 8 Ways to Get Home for Winter Break

Via car, with your parents Stare broodingly out the window while your mom aggressively interrogates you on your romantic prospects. Pray for the sweet embrace of death. Via car, with someone you randomly met on Facebook who promised to drive…

Jeremy Cohen
December 4, 2014