Category Archives

Tiger Mag’s Tips to Write Good

Appeal to your reader by using colloquialisms Good: I believe that your observations are ill-founded. Better: Yo momma got it all biznatched while I slayed her last night. Use colorful metaphors Good: Her movements were very provocative. Better: She was easier than a TV guide crossword!

Pinball Wizard Outed as Fraud

In a revelation that has rocked the world of competitive pinball, international champion Derek Dolohov, commonly known as the “Pinball Wizard,” has been outed as a fraud.  Dolohov gained fame unsurpassed in his sport partly due to his inspiring accomplishments…

Swine Flu Threatens Bestiality Rights

Members of the administration as well as the health industry are cautioning the public against engaging in contact with pigs due to swine flu. Many Americans, however, are disturbed by where this might be going. Cletus Tatum, director of the…

U-Store Announces Expansion

In the face of the current economic crisis, the Princeton University Store has recently announced a diversification of products sold at its stores on Nassau Street and University Place. “Because of declining sales due to our ridiculously high prices,” U-Store…