Most Princeton students already meet the main physiological prerequisite for hibernation: massive intake of food, which is then stored in fat deposits in order to survive the winter. However, not many of us actually get the chance to hibernate.
Dear Squirrel, you probably don’t remember me, considering that you were too busy being a dick. I tried to get by you on the street, but no. You were too busy turning an acorn around in your weird little skeletal paws. Not even eating it or intending to bury it. Just spinning it.
Dirty-looking white guy standing over a grill? We’re talking to you. Your mix of flannel and apron is neither aesthetically pleasing nor oozing sex appeal. And let’s face it, you’re probably going to burn the shit out of those steaks and end up ordering Domino’s anyway.
Only weeks after Facebook announced it had reached 1 billion users, a federal investigations commission has published a report revealing that the social networking site has only two certifiable account holders. One is none other than chief executive Mark Zuckerberg.
Election watchers of all political stripes were stunned Tuesday night as long-shot Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson decisively carried New Jersey, winning 100 percent of the 73 votes cast throughout the state.
