Many of us have been looking past a truth that stares us in the face. It stares at us as we walk across campus in the morning and the evenings, in rain and shine, and occasionally from the bushes. Your favorite admin and mine, Vice President for Campus Life Rochelle Calhoun, is hiding a cunning secret.
Have you ever wondered how Calhoun knows so much about the wants and needs of us students, particularly when the other admins do not? Have you ever noticed her foxy charm? Have YOU ever seen Calhoun and the campus fox in the same room? That’s right, you’ve guessed it. Rochelle Calhoun IS the campus fox-and I’m not referring to her fursona. Calhoun can transform herself physically into a fox to trot across campus to keep an ear to the ground, if you will. And I have proof! If you number and add up the letters in her name:
ROCHELLE
18 15 3 8 5 12 12 5
And those in campus fox:
CALHOUN
3 1 12 8 15 21 14 = 152
THE CAMPUS FOX
20 8 5 3 1 13 16 21 19 6 15 24 = 151
You’ll see that they’re only one digit off! Obviously “Rochelle Calhoun” is just a clever alias to pay homage to our student life VP’s foxy origins. Now it makes sense how Calhoun can handle all our issues-she just retreats to her den to do the work! Thank you, Fantastic Ms. Calhoun!
That’s all for today friends, but make sure to check in next week for a new ponspiracy! And remember, the next time you see our lovely campus fox ambling across campus, instead of taking a picture, suggest a new Wintersession event. I’m sure that clever fox
will take note;)
SYDNEY SPECTOR ’24
Illustrated by DANIELLE JENKINS ’23