» Snapchat your friends so everyone knows you’re capable of making genuine human connection #cuddling
» Finally adjust your clock for Daylight Saving Time
» Play a kickin’ piano solo with your jazz trio
» Put up that sick Jimi Hendrix poster next to your bed
» Count to five
» Another great jazz gig at the Blue Note; you’re killing it this week
» Reorganize your bookshelf according to the Dewey Decimal System
» Count backwards from five
» Get really good at shadow puppetry
» Pick up a phone call; holy crap it’s Tower Records and they want to sign you to a record deal
» Get a manicure
» Text Tony and Dave about the record deal; everyone is pumped
» Single-player thumb wrestling
» Another call from Tower Records; they don’t want Tony and Dave???
» Clear your browser history
» Build a Play-Doh hamburger
» Text Tony and Dave with the news; no one is pumped
» Put your hand in Alanis Morissette’s pocket
» Fistfight Tony
» Start to get hungry; consider eating that Play-Doh hamburger
» Tweet your band’s 1.4k followers about the break-up
» Knit a sweater for cousin Sally’s newborn
» Focus on your solo pianist career as international jazz sensation “Swingin’ Fingers”
» Dial 9-1-1; vow never to eat Play-Doh again
» Play Rock-Paper-Scissors with the EMT in the ambulance
» Wake up from a coma in a hospital bed, still spooning
» Learn from your near-death experience that friends are more important than fame and fortune; the band’s getting back together!!
– EJK ’16. Illustrated by MGM ’17 and CSO ’15.